The traditional practice of veiling at Mass is growing in popularity. Here’s my take on this returning trend.
My parish recently experienced some Mass time and demographic shifts, and there’s been a surge in veiling. A lot of the other moms have been asking about it, so I thought now would be a good time to lay out my thoughts.
Veiling was very popular on the East Coast where I used to live, and it’s only recently begun to pick up here in the Midwest. When I was discerning veiling in Virginia, I heard a variety of reasons, including simply that veils are pretty, that young Catholics enjoy older traditions and aesthetics, that veiling can put you in the right “headspace” to pray, or simply that you don’t have to worry about how your hair looks.
I wanted a deeper reason to veil. It had to be more for me than aesthetics or mindset, like dressing up on days you work from home. Here’s the conclusion I reached:
Why should Women Cover their Heads at Mass?
To this I answer, why do men uncover their heads as a sign of respect? During the National Anthem, for instance, or at the dinner table?
We can look at 1 Corinthians: “A man, on the other hand, should not cover his head, because he is the image and glory of God, but woman is the glory of man” (please do click through and read the surrounding verses as well).
In an earlier verse of the same chapter, “But I want you to know that Christ is the head of every man, and a husband the head of his wife, and God the head of Christ.”
It is appropriate for men to uncover their heads, and at the same time for women to cover them. This was the custom at the time, but the meaning behind it carries through today.
Small-s sacraments
The relationship between men and women is a small-s sacrament. It is a physical and earthly sign of a heavenly reality. This relationship signifies the union between God and His Church. In Ephesians we read, “For the husband is head of his wife just as Christ is head of the church, he himself the savior of the body,” and, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her.”
So when we see a husband and wife standing side-by-side in church, we see one head. The man represents Christ. The woman, Christ’s bride the Church, is in her turn veiled in beautiful lace as a bride.
This sacramental significance extends to all men and women, not just those who are married. A woman may also cover her hair with a hat, but I think the beauty of a veil better captures the relationship Paul is describing.
Veiling the Sacred
When I was discerning, I often heard veiling women say “We veil the sacred.” It seemed a little self-aggrandizing to me. I think that’s what Paul is getting at in 1 Corinthians, though, when he says “Woman is the glory of man.”
There are some things that should be hidden rather than flaunted. That is why clothing that reveals too much is not appropriate, and the standards of what is okay at Mass are stricter than, say, the mall or the beach or the grocery store. There is something mysterious about femininity, and something beautiful, that ought to be kept sacred and secret.
The Jewish custom this tradition springs from was to veil all vessels of life. As women veil and men uncover their heads, this drives home their different roles. Women have a uniquely life-giving charism, biologically, yes, but also in many less tangible ways.
I have heard that the sanctity of men depends on the expectations of women. That is, men will be as good and holy as women demand of them. We certainly see today the disproportionate participation of women in spiritual life. It is from women that the life of a community flows, outward from their families.
Didn’t the Church Abolish this Practice?
The Church has never explicitly rescinded the mandate to veil; rather, it has been omitted from the 1983 Code of Canon Law. The 1917 version spelled out that women should veil and men should uncover their heads.
I heard a priest say that women have the “privilege” of wearing a head covering at Mass, but it also seems that the mandate for men to uncover their heads has been removed. It seems to me that this is unfortunate. We are demanding fewer signs of respect for the King of the Universe!
People Will Judge Me for Veiling
I had a friend in college who started moving more toward traditional Catholic circles before I did, and what seemed to really get people was that she stopped wearing leggings and wore skirts instead. Other friends expressed concerns that she had a “Holier than Thou” attitude and was judging them for continuing to wear leggings and even pants.
Which, looking back—maybe you had an intuition that leggings were more revealing than a skirt, and perhaps are not suitable for all occasions?
In any case, her veiling didn’t seem to ruffle any feathers in the same way. I find that veiling also helps priests and extraordinary ministers predict that I will receive the Eucharist on the tongue (kneeling), so I haven’t had any surprised or negative reactions to that, either.
In fact, I often have other veiling women seek me out after Mass when I’m attending at a different church than usual. There seems to be a kind of sisterhood!
If anyone has an issue with it, they haven’t expressed it to me, and because my reasons are more serious than “getting in the right headspace,” I’m not overly concerned with what other people think. They can judge my lack of make-up or my compression socks or my dress that is all wrinkled from the car ride over just as easily.
If my veiling, in accord with God’s plan of creating us male and female and millennia of religious tradition, causes a mental problem for another woman, perhaps it can be a moment for her to discern more deeply why she is bothered by it and come to her own conclusions about her faith life and relationship with religious symbols. That’s not my business or my responsibility.
Practicality of Veiling
Well, it can be a bit distracting to admire all the veils at church, but you can do the same with clothes. Or hairstyles!
With little kids, I thought infinity veils would be the way to go, but I found that they are too prone to little hands tugging. And that tugging moves a lot of fabric, all around your head. With a triangle/mantilla-style veil, there’s less grab-able material. I find a wig clip holds it in place very well on my slippery hair.
I’m sure women who wear a chapel cap have even less inconvenience, but as I mentioned above, I like the bridal imagery.
Every woman also has her own circumstances for when to veil. Some veil every time they pray, at home or at Church. Others veil in the church building. Some veil for the duration of Mass. I choose to veil when I am in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. That is, when I’m in the same room as Christ’s real presence.
What do you think?
Have you discerned veiling yet? Have you noticed who veils in your church? I find the demographics of who chooses to wear a veil varies a ton by region.
Let me know your thoughts!
And while you are at Mass, perhaps veiling as Mary did, consider incorporating Sorrowful Mother devotions into your Mass prayers.
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